Yesterday, a good friend shared with me this poem. 

“I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I fall in.
I am lost... I am helpless.
It isn't my fault.
It takes forever to find a way out.

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend I don't see it.
I fall in again.
I can't believe I am in the same place.
But, it isn't my fault.
It still takes me a long time to get out.

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in. It's a habit.
My eyes are open.
I know where I am.
It is my fault. I get out immediately.

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.

I walk down another street.”  
― Portia NelsonThere's a Hole in My Sidewalk: The Romance of Self-Discovery

He promised himself he will never walk on this same street again and I believe him because it all starts with awareness and choice.

Awareness and choice. Yes, life happens. Yes, it can be painful. Yes, some things cannot be prevented. And yes, you are responsible for the way you react to what is happening. 

You may not be able to change what happens to you but you may want to be aware when the same or similar things happen and happen again.
What is different if you consider that life doesn’t happen to you but for you?

Alice is one of my client. Her dad passed away when she was very young and, being the oldest, she had to take care of her siblings while her mom was working. Her paradigm as always had been to take care of everyone. Today, in her 60s, she is tired of it and she decided that she would stay single for the rest of her life in order to not have to take care of a man anymore. 

Who told her that relationship was about taking care of the others but herself? We discussed the possibility of relationship being fun, being a partnership, an exchange, where she cares about him and he spoils her. We even envisioned her having a lover and not a husband. I had the pleasure to see my client turn into an excited teenager once again. Love can be love. Love can be exchanges, fun, travel, joyful moments. Love can be what you want it to be. Just choose the street you want to walk on and enjoy.

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